Valentine’s isn’t always all hearts and flowers
Valentine’s Day can be wonderful.
If you choose to spend it with the person who you love, enjoying and indulging in the wonderful connection that you have, it can be magical.
If you’re alone, it can be difficult.
If your partner walked out on you unexpectedly the night before, it can be devastating.
Several years ago, this was how I spent Valentine’s Day.
At 11pm on February 13th, the man who I thought I would be spending the rest of my life with walked out on me unexpectedly.
I was in shock.
I was waiting for the punch line.
Surely this was just a bad joke. A very very bad joke.
But it wasn’t.
It was real.
It was painful.
It was heart-breaking.
The bottom fell out of my world.
When he walked out of the door, he took with him my partner, my best friend, my business mentor, my technical team, and the vast majority of my savings account.
I felt completely and totally alone.
My romantic life was in tatters, my business was up in the air, my financial stability had been removed and my confidence was in ruins.
My Worst Valentine’s Day Ever…
I woke up, Valentine’s morning feeling like I’d hit rock bottom.
I cried, I talked, I cried, I vented and cried even more.
(If this is where you’re at right now, there are some links at the bottom of this post that might help you with your healing).
Most of my friends and close family members were either married, in long-term relationships or having babies.
At that point, it felt like I was a million miles away from the life I wanted.
I was done.
For the first time in a long time, I realised I didn’t want to be in a relationship.
I’d spent the last 10-15 years of my life pretty much going from one relationship to the next, without much time for me in between, and it felt like it was now my time.
Having spent so much time with other people, I’d lost touch a little with my ‘Inner Claire.’ What did she want? What did she need? What was important to her? How did she want to spend her time? What did she want to do?
It was time to find out.
So I decided to go on a bit of a journey of discovery. Learning more about myself, learning how to become my own best friend, learning to love myself, exactly as I was.
Spending quality time with me.
Going out dancing, travelling, spending time with friends, visiting places I loved, meditating, journaling…doing the things I loved, and enjoying them!
By spending this time making my life ‘All about me,’ I was feeling fulfilled in a way that I hadn’t done in years.
I was happy, having fun, enjoying life.
I was absolutely beaming, and everywhere I went, people were remarking about how I was radiating this great energy. I kept hearing that I was bringing a certain ‘sparkle’ when I entered a room.
Everywhere I went people were being magnetically drawn to my energy.
And not just any people, the people who I wanted to spend time with. The ones I resonated with, the kindred spirits, the soul sisters and brothers; my kinda people.
So I asked myself, what had changed? Why was I all of a sudden attracting a different kind of person into my life?
After a while, it occurred to me that it’s because for the first time in a long time I was being me. Unashamedly, unreservedly, undeniably me.
I realised that by being all of me, I was giving other people permission to be all of them too.
It was transforming how I felt, the work I was doing, the experiences I was having, and the people I was coming into contact with.
Without that disastrous Valentine’s day, I would never have gone on the journey that led me to the people I call my soul family, the work that I was put here to do and a whole raft of experiences that have become cherished memories.
I would never have gone on the journey that led me back to myself, to who I truly wanted to be.
Without my Valentine’s Day from hell, I wouldn’t be where I am now.
So it turns out the worst V-Day ever, was actually the best gift I could have asked for.
And if you are nursing a broken heart today, here are some articles that might help with the healing:
Wishing You Love,